Gender Psychology: So You Want to be a Bad Boy
December 18, 2012 3 Comments
So You Want to be a Bad Boy?
Any guy who has ever watched The New Kid move into town and run off with his girlfriend understands the appeal of being a Bad Boy, as does any girl who has ever gotten involved with a troubled loner. Bad Boys have a special place in cinematic and fictional lure, as they scorch through the even-keeled lives of more-conventional types like shooting stars.
What many Nice Guys, Good Guys, and even some Women do not understand is that Being a Bad Boy is not an easy endeavor. While it would seem to take no larger effort than to be anti-conformist and sullen, the reality is that a number of often-tragic circumstances conspire to create a Bad Boy, much like any monster. This article aims to explain some of the realities of the Bad Boy existence, as well serve as a cautionary tale to those would-be Bad Boys who are considering a turn to the Dark Side.
Who is a Bad Boy?
There are plenty of articles all over the internet dissecting Why Women chase after Bad Boys. Articles within that vein often ask more questions than they answer, since it is very difficult to articulate the allure of the Bad Boy to most women; in fact, the girls themselves can rarely put the appeal of Bad Boys into usable wording.
For the sake of argument, just understand that Women Love Bad Boys as a self-evident Proof. This notion has transcended both cultures and generations at this point, and the captivating nature of the Bad Boy is in fact is one thing that mothers and daughters of disparate ages can agree upon.
Since we can agree for the moment that Women Love Bad Boys, the next questions are, “Am I a Bad Boy?”, followed by “How do I become a Bad Boy?”
To answer the first part: if you have to ask, you are not a Bad Boy. While Bad Boys may be introspective and thoughtful, they are rarely mired in self-doubt or uncertainty.
Speaking as a Bad Boy, people like me are more prone to ask themselves, “Am I a Bad Person?” after a particularly devious action. As in all things, there are progressions, and in this case the progressions are directly tied to your own morals. Does kissing a married woman make you a bad person? Does stealing money out of a woman’s wallet make you a bad person (assuming she owes you, on several levels)? Does having sex with a mother and her daughter in the same calendar month make you a bad person? Does fighting a 55-year old father-of-three make you a Bad Person?
These are not questions normal people ask themselves. These are questions reserved for Bad Boys. Your own conscience will determine if you are Bad Person or not.
To answer the second question, allow me to walk you through one way in which one might become a Bad Boy. You can then decide for yourself if becoming a Bad Boy is an endeavor you wish to pursue.
How Does One Become a Bad Boy?
“Give us brilliant boys that we wanna fuck, man
Full of ecstasy, hard drugs, and bad luck
Yeah yeah yeah
Turn the lights back on
You burn so hard
But you won’t burn long…”
No one looking at a smiling baby boy ever thinks, “One day, this kid is going to be an absolute bastard.” Contrary to what George Thorogood will tell you, it’s very difficult to make the argument that children are born contemptuous of others or with inherent malice, even if you want to argue that some children are born with a much-greater potential to be Bad. Most often, the circumstances of a boy’s life need to conspire to turn him “Bad”.
One commonality I see among Bad Boys of various cultural or socioeconomic backgrounds is Isolation. Bad Boys do not properly acclimate to Social Norms because they generally lack the foundational support of a loving family, be it the Flesh-and-Blood variety or the Close-Knit Friends version. Bad Boys become simultaneously self-reliant and suspicious of others, leading to this vicious cycle in which they become further and further detached from the Social Mean.
This leads the Bad Boy to develop Trust Issues, which manifest in a number of ways that are bizarrely-attractive to Women. For example, most Women are well-acquainted with the idea that some Men are reluctant to commit to a relationship. While this becomes irritating in most cases for Women, in the case of the Bad Boy, this makes him more-attractive because the inability to commit is out of his control; it is a consequence of prior abuse or a lack of loving support during his formative years. This frequently leads many Women to fall into patterns in which they desperately chase Bad Boys, which of course makes the Bad Boy in question pull further away.
Contrary to belief, Bad Boys actually have very little Game, and most are not actively manipulating Women. What happens in actuality is that Bad Boys start to grow comfortable with Women, rewarding their patience with sweet behavior, until something triggers an underlying Trust Issue within the Bad Boy. At this point, he pulls away strongly, which makes the shell-shocked Woman start questioning what she did to scare him off. Again, this causes desperation in certain Women, leading to the aforementioned cycle in which she chases after the Bad Boy despite the emotional turmoil he is causing her.
Speaking personally, I was not vehemently anti-social growing up; I just managed to make it to adulthood without really finding that “Second Family” or tight group of friends that most people find in childhood or High School or College. Whereas most well-adjusted types manage to find acceptance in a Family System of some sort, Bad Boys are often kept at Arm’s Length from people until they start to prefer it that way.
Bad Boys learn to become extremely independent because there is never the sense of unconditional loyalty from a Family System. Life becomes a high-wire tightrope act without the emotional safety net of supportive Family and Friends. As a result, a Bad Boy becomes increasingly more capable of relying upon himself while hesitating (and later refusing) to count on others.
Another area Bad Boys specialize in is Loss. Bad Boys often go through entire lifetimes of attrition at a relatively-early age, which consequently makes people more replaceable to them later in life. This is frequently seen in popular culture. One prominent example is in the James Bond films, in which Bond’s beloved Vesper is killed in the film Casino Royale. After incurring this Loss, Bond becomes irretrievably-hardened, and other people (especially Women) become completely interchangeable to him.
Bad Boys often deal with Losses so profound and at such a young age that their character is entirely changed. While this does not necessarily have to be the death of a loved one, often a major event or series of events occur that drive a Bad Boy on a divergent path from the rest of society. This uniqueness may likely serve to increase his attractiveness, as both his mindset and his ability to cope with tragedy are greatly different than those of more-socialized Men.
To offset the lack of emotional support and social protection, a Bad Boy learns to cultivate a very specific set of skills, most of them survival-based, that appeal to Women on a profound, sexual level. Speaking in Darwinian terms, a Bad Boy is attractive to most Women because in a theoretical “Survival Situation” (such as Prehistoric Man foraging for food), they have an Internal Locus of Control that allows them to surmount odds that would cower other Men. This is basically the same thing as Willpower, which I have written about elsewhere extensively.
Darwinists like myself can easily see why Women Love Bad Boys, but more-domesticated and socially well-adjusted types may have trouble making the logical connection. In short, Bad Boys appeal to most Women because they are better at both surviving and protecting her potential offspring than less-malicious types. Many Women unconsciously hope this instinct of self-preservation would eventually transfer to herself and her potential children.
As they say, “No Man is an Island”, and no Boy is Born Bad. The decision to consciously embrace moral ambiguity or even Nihilism is a common Bad Boy ritual in which someone rejects the comforts and support of a loving family in lieu of Power and Self-Sufficiency. This amorality is often in fact a protective Mask that separates the Bad Boy from would-be social persecutors.
The World is Cruel, and to cope with this the typical Bad Boy takes extraordinary measures to protect himself from it. After all, he has reached adulthood or near-adulthood without the feeling of familial protection and support that more well-adjusted Men experience. A ferocious social Mask serves the same function as a scarecrow, chasing away many of those who would potentially injure the Bad Boy emotionally or physically.
Bad Boys are frequently preoccupied with Money and Power. These two things allow a Bad Boy to live in what a Bad Boy considers to be Relative Comfort: the freedom to be emotionally-indifferent and independent. Nothing vexes a Bad Boy more than having to rely upon someone else, and large amounts of Money and Power keep a protective bubble around him.
It is now pertinent to bring up the Nature-versus-Nurture argument: while some Bad Boys have a natural predilection toward anti-social behavior, others are “Good Boys” who make a conscious effort to be “Bad” in order to acquire the aforementioned Money and Power.
The Heel Turn
Some well-adjusted “Good Boys” will force themselves to do out-of-character “Bad Things” as a means of accruing Power or coping with the cold cruelties of the world. A result of this “Fake It ‘Til You make It” mentality is that a Good Boy eventually becomes a true Bad Boy by pushing his personal envelope of ethics too far. This fall-from-grace is known as a Heel Turn.
A Heel Turn occurs when a good-natured person decides that they are going to stop acting ethically and with the good of the community in mind. A Heel Turn involves a dedication to personal selfishness and anti-social behavior, typically in a way that is extremely out-of-character for the person in-question.
One example from popular culture is seen in the Star Wars movies, as Anakin Skywalker forces himself to commit acts of malice until his entire character changes:
In the opposing fashion, some kids who are raised in a loving environment are so deeply anti-social that no amount of familial support can prevent them from submitting to their dark, even psychopathic urges. This theme is well-covered in the 50 Shades of Grey novels.
One thing that inspires logical Women to persist in their efforts to “Fix” a Bad Boy is the idea that underneath a mound of social refuse is a gentle, kind-hearted soul crying for help. While this can be true in some situations, in other situations a Bad Boy is “too far gone” for any reasonable Woman to salvage him.
The term “Bad Boy” is not well-defined, but there are some traits that repeatedly appear:
Lack of Self-Doubt: A very attractive trait in most Bad Boys is their absence of Self-Doubt. While more-socialized Men are likely to confer with their group before taking action, the loner Bad Boy is accustomed to relying upon his sole judgement in making decisions. This lack of insecurity is like cat-nip to younger females, many of whom are trapped in their own heads with paralyzing self-doubt.
Lack of Socialization: By definition, a Bad Boy displays a high number of Anti-Social Behaviors. These can vary in how enticing they respectively are to Women, from intriguing to extremely attractive. As I have written in my article on the Wild Side, almost all Women are forced into stronger standards of social decorum than Men are, at least in Western society. A Bad Boy’s willingness to not only act upon but embrace the anti-social aspects of his personality is completely enticing to a Woman who has to go around being Miss Sunshine all day long.
This Lack of Socialization can range from borderline-feral to borderline-criminal to ill-tempered. The common characteristic is that the Bad Boy swims against the social current in almost all situations, or at least conforms very reluctantly.
Preoccupation: Another key way in which Bad Boys separate themselves from more-socialized Men is their chronic inattentiveness and emotional distance. Whereas many Men are prepared to make a given Woman or Women the center of their universe, Bad Boys are preoccupied with their drugs, guns, hockey teams, motorcycles, etc. Furthermore, this Preoccupation is typically of the aggressive or anti-social nature; a Bad Boy would be much less-likely to be preoccupied with video games than he would be getting into fights outside strip clubs.
Substance Abuse: Bad Boys have two options: they can engage in violence (the end result of their ASPD), or they can attempt to suppress their anti-social rage with alcohol and/or drugs. This leads to a brutal cycle in which the Bad Boy tries to corral his aggressive instincts with booze or drugs, which of course is horribly ineffective. The persistent Substance Abuse is one of the justifications Women tend to make when defending or excusing the sociopathic behavior of a Bad Boy.
Swagger: A Bad Boy is a natural survivor, and thus projects a menace and self-confidence that could be collectively defined as “Swagger.” A Bad Boy is not concerned with getting into physical altercations because he has proven to himself time and time again that he can endure them. This again makes a Bad Boy very attractive to many Women on a Darwinian level.
Throw-down: Bad Boys have a special power called “Throw-Down”, which worldly Women will agree can be defined as the ability to seize the moment. Bad Boys, for example, may not be concerned with getting intimate in public because they are more-focused on taking advantage of a given opportunity; in this case, a Woman who is primed and ready for physical contact. This ability, to act irrespective of outside conditions, is called Throw-Down, and Bad Boys have it in spades.
Trust Issues: Bad Boys have become extremely self-reliant because they have likely not experienced the support of a loving family, or have had repeated traumatic events occur that compromised their ability to trust other people. This leads to Bad Boys preferring people at arms-length, and developing an array of skills meant to prevent people from injuring them emotionally or physically. To protect themselves, Bad Boys often display large amounts of financial or physical power, again as a means of self-protection.
Here is a group of Bad Boys, taken from both Fiction and Real Life. Try to identify the common traits that unite them.
(Note: most of the Bad Boys in “The Club” are square-looking white guys. I am a square-looking white guy. I feel it would be insincere of me to put up a bunch of African-American and Latino “Bad Boys” just to appear racially-nonpartisan. When Women attribute “Bad Boy” traits to me personally, they are usually not the mannerisms of Denzel Washington in “Training Day” or Antonio Banderas in “Desperado”; instead, I am saddled with stereotypes put forth by other square-looking white guys. The Square-White-Guy role has been my personal experience, and I cannot apologize for it.)
Giacoma Casanova is a very interesting cat, and probably the only Italian I respect. He lived a positively absurd, syphilis-ridden lifestyle, mooching off rich guys and sleeping with their wives and daughters.
James Dean is “The Original Bad Boy.” He remains, “a cultural icon of teenage disillusionment,” so much so that Rebel Without a Cause posters can still be found in the bedrooms of 16-year old girls. He died in the ultimate Bad Boy fashion, i.e. a “Blaze of Glory” fiery car wreck.
Johnny Cash was the original Bad Boy of Rock N’ Roll. When he was not writing songs about cocaine, murder, and running from the police, he was battling substance addiction and playing sold-out shows at prisons.
“I live for myself and I answer to nobody.” – Steve McQueen
Steve McQueen was a Bad Ass. He personified Bad Boy-cool for an entire generation of film-goers. While some of his exploits may have been exaggerated, McQueen certainly set an example for aspiring Bad Boys everywhere by being difficult to work with, but so in-demand and popular that directors and producers were forced to deal with him.
Bruce Wayne best represents the idea of the Bad Boy caricature. In all media, “Bruce Wayne” is this figurative mask that Batman (the dominant personality) slips on to fool the weak-minded.
For his part, Batman really turns up the volume on the “Bad Boy” ruse that is Bruce Wayne by playing the part of the drunken, entitled buffoon to perfection. He makes womanizing more of a game than anything else, or even a chore, which obviously is in stark contrast to the control-freak characteristics that the Batman personality represents.
The ladies know Mr. Big as the one-man wrecking crew who tormented horrid social bane Carrie Bradshaw for 10 years before consenting to take one for the team and finally marry the bitch before she could spawn. While some Women will acknowledge that Big was emotionally-abusive and even nihilistic in his dealings with bulimic Mayan terror Bradshaw, the 50-60% of Women who blindly identify with Carrie will adamantly defend him under Bad Boy 101 logic, like, “His old relationships made him reluctant to commit,” or “You don’t know what it’s like when it’s just the two of them.”
George Clooney is the real-life representation of a Bad Boy. He is the sterling example of what separates a Bad Boy from a “Player”, the key difference being that he does not need to deceive or lie to women in order for them to clamor after him. He stubbornly insists upon remaining a bachelor, much to the frustration and arousal of red-blooded American girls in 50 states. He makes cool movies.
Here is Christian at work:
Christian gets bonus points for being extra manipulative and morally-vacant. Note: Do not try to keep up with Nip/Tuck if you are not a fan; it’s just ridiculous.
Tommy is an alcoholic Fire-Fighter. He has less-than-zero Impulse Control, the thread that commonly links most criminals. He would be a complete social outcast if not for his role as a Fire-Fighter. His alcoholism, fearlessness, rage, and unwillingness to temper himself all make him ridiculously attractive to the Women on the TV show Rescue Me.
Don Draper is an alcoholic womanizer, albeit a very successful one. He is an excellent case-study in the “Bad Boy Mask” theory proposed above, engaging in Bad Boy antics in order to maintain the facade of his character. Don, alias Dick Whitman, consistently acts in power-hungry, self-indulgent ways that may oppose his natural character, but are essential for re-enforcing the Bad Boy Mask that he has decided to wear.
I used Matt Bomer because I think he represents the character well for most Women.
Without recounting the details of the novels, Christian Grey is of course the protagonist of the 50 Shades novels. If you are a Woman reading this, you obviously know who he is and what he does that makes him such a Bad Boy.
The Ways Women Treat Bad Boys
Being a Bad Boy is an All-or-Nothing proposition, but it is one that most Men would not trade for the more-moderate role Women assign to the majority of Men.
Bad Boys seem to have it made, as they get Women at their most sexually-ardent while not having to deal Women during times of emotional turbulence or vulnerability. What Man wouldn’t take that package deal?
The trade-off is that Women completely objectify Bad Boys, and have almost no use for them outside of their role as a sexual interest. Bad Boys are objectified in much the same way as Pin-Up models and strippers are, even if the process is gender-specific.
Here is an Overview of What Women Expect and Do Not Expect from Bad Boys:
What Women Expect
Women expect Bad Boys to rock their world in the bedroom, and if a Bad Boy turns out to be underwhelming or even average in bed, much of his mystique is lost. Since the typical Bad Boy provides little or none of the emotional solace that more sensitive men might, it is imperative that a legitimate Bad Boy demonstrate outstanding sexual skill almost every time things get physical.
This can include the aforementioned Throw-Down (spur-of-the moment sex, often in semi-public or other potentially-compromising situations), exceptional size and/or stamina, high degrees of animalism and creativity, and no evidence of clinging or emotional investment. The Bad Boy is the sexual convenience store for a longing woman, and she expects to get The Goods with minimal complication or investment.
Adventure and Excitement:
The Bad Boy, with his secretive past, is the alluring alternative to the more-transparent boyfriend or husband in a Woman’s life. A Woman is attracted to a Bad Boy because his lifestyle is seemingly a mash-up of affairs and bar-fights, which stands in exotic contrast to her daily ritual of laundry and television-watching with her dutiful boyfriend or spouse.
Women expect their lives to become much-more interesting with the introduction of a Bad Boy, even if they do not explicitly say so. After all, a Woman yearning for stability will have a much-easier time finding a substance-over-style type of Man in her daily orbit; the Bad Boy represents something novel by being so relatively unpredictable.
Younger Women, especially, love Drama because it puts them at the center of attention. The Bad Boy induces Drama into a Woman’s life by compelling her loyal friends to be distrustful of and possibly aggressive toward him. A Woman can become a fixation within the lives of her friends and other potential love interests by playing the role of the victim and taking up with a detestable Bad Boy.
It goes beyond the scope of this already-long article to delve into the need some Women have to inject Drama into their lives. Taking this Proof again as self-evident, it should be obvious that a Bad Boy is a drama reservoir, and immature or needy Women are going to crave the attention that co-mingling with a standard-issue Bad Boy can produce.
What Women Do Not Expect
A very appealing Bad Boy trait is his unwillingness to commit. This works very well for a Woman who is similarly-unwilling to commit, due to emotional unavailability or pragmatic reasons. This also works for Women who are in committed relationships who are seeking to stray.
A Bad Boy ceases to be a Bad Boy when he outs himself as another Nice Boy looking for love. This will be like nails-on-a-chalkboard to a Woman who is seeking to keep emotional distance between herself and her sexual partners.
Most Women have an array of Men within their life that constantly dote upon them, tending to their various emotional and psychological problems with a soft touch. While there are some Women in unfortunate positions who have no one like this, most Women are actually besieged by considerate, courteous sorts who Women believe (rightly or wrongly) are trying to incur favor in order to bed them. The stereotype of the dutiful friend tending to a Woman’s emotional needs while she runs around with a parade of bikers and jocks has become a contemporary classic.
Most young girls are actually overwhelmed by the affection bestowed upon them, and come to not only take it for granted, but to become irritated with it. The fascinating contrast to the Men who hold open doors and pull out chairs for her is the irritable loner who barely can glance her way.
The appeal of the Bad Boy is that he is wildly unpredictable. Once again, this injects excitement into a Woman’s otherwise ho-hum life. A Bad Boy can be like a great novel, as the reader anxiously awaits what lies on the next page and is desperate to find out what comes next. Just as no one wants to read a predictable story, no Woman wants her Bad Boy to be easily-figured out.
Bad Boy/Good Man
It is very possible to be a Bad Boy yet be highly-ethical; the ethics of a Bad Boy are simply much different than most.
At some point, Conventional Laws and Morality become constraints that prohibit certain types of Righteous Men from acting decisively and truly. The evolved Bad Boy is much-more preoccupied with The Greater Good than he is with following more-traditional rules. This is something Women astutely observe, and begin to find intrigue in a Bad Boy’s motives when his actions indicate that he is ethically-conflicted.
The “Good” Bad Boy will Break a Nose to Save a Life. While some Bad Boys are simply sadistic and self-preoccupied, there is a certain segment of Bad Boys that have noble intentions at the root of their malicious actions. Again, Women tend to see issues in degrees while Men tend to segment issues into Black and White. Combined with their higher levels of Empathy, the ability of Women to see through a Bad Boy’s grim veneer only serves to make him more attractive to them.
Bad Boys vs. Assholes
”Do you think this is who I am? I am a professional thief, I don’t run around killing people I don’t have to.”
– Seth Gecko (George Clooney), From Dusk Til Dawn
I have written much about Assholes, Dicks, and other constituents of the Brotherhood of Men is this rather-popular article. A common misconception is that all Bad Boys are Assholes, when this is certainly not the case.
Bad Boys are frequently Men of ethics who have decided that certain ends justify the means. For example, a Bad Boy may decide that dealing methamphetamine is an acceptable recourse if it means providing for his family. There are noble, praise-worthy, and selfless elements to this type of behavior, all of which distinguish a ruthless-but-devoted Bad Boy from a garden-variety Asshole.
As Asshole is a landmine of non-discriminating obnoxiousness. There is frequently little rhyme-or-reason to the behavior of an Asshole, aside from the continuing need for the Asshole to entertain and indulge her or himself. Bad Boys can be extremely-decent Men, which can greatly contribute to their attractiveness to Women, but Bad Boys are often willing to go to lengths that Assholes or Nice Guys are not in order to protect or provide for their loved ones.
Here is a list of concessions a Man makes when he becomes a legitimate Bad Boy:
* Unless a Woman is desperately attracted to you, she will barely acknowledge you during non-carnal situations. A fair question to ask yourself is, “Would I be crushed if I saw the girl I was with eight hours ago holding hands with her boyfriend/husband and refusing to look at me?” This is your life, future Bad Boy. Again, if the girl is desperately attracted to you, she will fall all over herself to get your attention, but if you are just a fling or a sexual surrogate then she will spend most of her time avoiding you like the plague.
* In a similar fashion, Women who are both emotionally and sexually-satisfied will have absolutely no use for a Bad Boy. Something I frequently have encountered is a scenario in which some Women will not even be civil to me because I am an obvious Bad Boy. I am not speaking about disaffected ex-girlfriends, but grocery-store clerks, neighbors, random acquaintances, etc.
A common event will be one of these Women being very friendly and outgoing with others, then immediately becoming hostile or otherwise rude to an obvious Bad Boy. This might be a self-protective reaction, or this could be the projection of prior rage toward a Bad Boy onto someone who embodies the stereotype. Regardless, as a Bad Boy, a lot of the Women in your orbit will be surprisingly venomous toward you, if they acknowledge you at all.
* Are you comfortable having no one really know or care who you are? Are you ready to be nothing more than a fantasy, or an image? In fact, most Women are going to get annoyed when you try telling them that you used to care for sick puppies or play fantasy football or whatever. As a Bad Boy, the only personality traits you are allowed to display while retaining your attractiveness are the ones a Woman assigns you.
* Can you stand the idea of lots and lots of people hating you? Even if they have never spoken with you or been in your company for any length of time?
As a Bad Boy, you are going to draw the attention of the female community, and at some point the Women are certain to force this line of conversation upon the Men. Your intentions, mannerisms, and personality are going to be dissected at-length by a bunch of people who barely know you. This would be fine, except that this dissection is going to be done by a number of people with a vested interest in making you look bad or “protecting” the attracted Women from you for purely self-serving reasons.
This type of scorn will know no bounds; some people may become so simultaneously disgusted and intrigued by you that they will put up webpages dedicated to attacking your character. Bad Boys are ready to handle this because they already mistrust people and almost completely rely upon themselves, but most people trying to become Bad Boys are going to have a real hard time walking into a chorus of derision on a regular basis.
* Are you ready to spend a major holiday, like Christmas or New Year’s Eve, alone? Because it can and will happen. Women want to be with family and friends during major holidays, and you are neither. If you want the Bad Boy perks, you had better be ready for the cold and discomfort that comes in tandem with them.
* What are you going to do the first time an angry husband takes your phone number (or address) out of a Woman’s phone and confronts you? Are you ready for an incredibly-awkward e-mail or Facebook message in which some guy verbally assaults you for bewitching his wife? Can you look another Man in the eye and admit that you are banging his spouse? Will you apologize? Get confrontational? Possessive? Answer these questions for yourself now, because your mind will go blank if your bang-buddy’s husband starts walking toward you with a gun.
Aspiring Bad Boys should be warned that great personal sacrifices are traded off in Becoming Bad: mainly the comforts and unconditional support of Family and Friends. While it may seem like a sweet deal to be able to swoop in with only a bad attitude and walk away with a Woman on each arm, the reality is that Being a Bad Boy is a lonely walk down a dark road. There are benefits, to be sure, but there are also a number of compromises that most Men are simply not emotionally-capable of making.
As a Bad Boy, you get a lot of flirtatious smiles from strange Women. I got one just as I was typing this. But those smiles are empty and fleeting. The reality is that almost all Women want to take a Man and make him her family, not run around with some preoccupied loner living on borrowed time. The Nice Guy may fantasize about having Women lust after him, but the Bad Boy fantasizes about one Woman who will truly care for him. As they say, the grass is always greener on the other side.